Mile-High Club

Are you a member of the mile-high club? Several years ago, I was asked if I belonged to the mile-high club and my obvious answer was no. Then, I asked which airlines offered such memberships! I guess I was innocent back then. Years later, I learned that many people including some of my friends are members of this very privileged and prestigious club, and some have earned Elite Status!  

There is something exciting about being in the air, perhaps the freedom that it brings – like Icarus, or it is the altitude that contributes to feeling horny? No matter what, here are a few tips on how to navigate your membership and keep upgrading your status.

You are not alone.

You are not alone, so be considerate to others. Most likely you won’t fool anyone but if you keep calm and cool people won’t bother you. Forget using a blanket, everyone knows why you brought it. Instead, stick to the airplane’s bathroom, so that even if everyone suspects what’s going on, they don’t have to witness it and feel uncomfortable. The best time to do it is on the long distance flights to Australia, Asia or India, or an overnight quickie to Europe. 

Dress code.

The key to better inflight sex experience is easy access. We recommend breezy dresses, full long skirts, or sweatpants. Easy off and on.

Small spaces.

Unless you travel first class or business on Emirates, your chances are likely to be cramped into tiny bathroom. There is not much room to start inventing new positions.  Your best choice is to navigate between blow job, hand job or standing doggy style. And make sure it is quick (and quiet), remember others want to use the bathroom, too.

Play hard.

Whatever happens, play hard. If you happen to get caught, you can always play the sick card. And if you get dirty looks from the other passengers, ignore with a polite smile, most likely they envy your status.